The Dark Side of Managing Up: When Leadership Goes Wrong

You know how we're always talking about leadership skills and building strong teams? Well, today I want to dive into something that's been on my mind lately – the concept of managing up and how it can go terribly wrong if we're not careful.

Now, managing up isn't a bad thing. In fact, it's essential. At its core, managing up is about building positive relationships with your managers to achieve shared goals. It's basically managing your manager (and sometimes training them on how to manage you better). Even as executives, we all have someone we report to – whether it's a board, investors, or other stakeholders.

But here's where things can get messy...

When Managing Up Becomes Manipulation

There's a darker side to this whole managing up thing that I've witnessed far too often in my years in business. Some leaders use upward management as a way to stroke their bosses' egos while treating their direct reports poorly. They create this illusion that they're influential, effective leaders when the reality couldn't be further from the truth.

As Fortune's Lila MacLellan puts it perfectly: "This toxic approach to managing isn't just unethical, it's dangerous."

And she's absolutely right. I've seen this manipulative approach destroy teams and organizations from the inside out. It usually happens at that intermediate level – you know, those middle managers who are desperately trying to climb the ladder at any cost.

The Real Cost of Toxic Upward Management

When trust breaks down between a manager and their team, something devastating happens. Those employees stop sharing their ideas for innovation and change. They become disengaged, paranoid, and honestly? They start looking for the exit.

The leaders at the top? They're often completely in the dark about what's happening down below. They're getting glowing reports from their middle managers while the culture is rotting from within. By the time they realize what's happening, it's often too late – the damage is done.

I've watched organizations spiral into crisis mode because of this exact scenario. Self-motivated behaviour, manipulation, and nihilism start spreading through the ranks like wildfire.

What Healthy Managing Up Actually Looks Like

So what does good upward management look like? It starts with strong bilateral communication and alignment on success metrics. It's about transparency, not manipulation.

As senior leaders, we need to make ourselves available to everyone in our organization – not just our direct reports. I make it a point to regularly check in with people at all levels of our team. Those conversations often reveal things that might never make it up the traditional chain of command.

Here's something I've learned: Leaders who are on the dark side of managing up are actually pretty easy to spot. They're constantly managing their reputation outside their teams, and they take credit – all the credit – for their teams' wins. Sound familiar?

My Leadership Tip for the Week 💡

Want to know what effective upward management really looks like? It's about matching your communication style to your boss's needs and being proactive about sharing information.

For example, I create shared documents that make our workflow visible and organized. The goal is to make everyone's job easier by keeping their needs in mind.

It's about being genuinely helpful, not manipulative.

Moving Forward

As leaders, we have a responsibility to model healthy upward management while also being vigilant about the toxic version creeping into our organizations. We need to create environments where people feel safe to be honest, where innovation is encouraged, and where credit is shared generously.

Because at the end of the day, real leadership isn't about managing up to get ahead – it's about lifting everyone up along the way.

Until Next Time,